So every time I open up my Gmail I’m terrified I’m going to push the cute little Buzz icon that just appeared a few days ago that’s just begging you to click on it. I guess once you get in there, they’ll ask you if you want to sign up, but what if they don’t? What if all my 223 contacts are suddenly told I’m “following” them? Some of them would be quite surprised, like Andrew Sullivan, or my personal meteorologist who does live chats, or several editors who used “Democrat” adjectivally, or a bed and breakfast in Hermanus, South Africa. Some of them, like my private friend who tries not to think about Google reading her email so they can figure out what advertisements to send me, would be so horrified she’d probably never send me another message.

But what do I do if one of my Gmail contacts clicks on his or her cute little icon? How do I unfollow them, if I don’t even know I’m following them?

Oh, Google, I cared so much for you, but now you know much too much about me. I think I’m going to have to reconsider Bing, and, horror of all horrors, Outlook.

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